I keep scribbling couplets in Urdu. I have been toying with the idea of publishing it for others to read and give me pointers, and after gathering up my courage here I am with four of the most recent ones. Hope you like it, your inputs are most welcome.
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| Image : Inmagine.com |
Jinnke dareechon se rehna tha door,
Unhike khwabgaah mein hum tashreef le gaye.
*****
Abr mein dhoonda karte the jinhe
Woh aaj haal-e-dil suna gaye.
*****
Samah sufiyana hogaya unke aane se
Warna toh hum khiza mein jiya karte the.
*****
Jo shaamein sirf kaaghaz pe likha karte the
Abb aap pe kharch karne lage hain.
*****
Wah Wah the lines in Urdu make it so perfect and romantic... :-)
ReplyDeleteUrdu Language makes it more romantic indeed :)
Deletesweet :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Zoyeb :)
DeleteWah! Wah! Namrota Ji. Bohut Baadiyaan :)
ReplyDeleteShukriya Jahid Ji shukriya :)
DeleteI didn't get some of the words, to be honest.
ReplyDeleteBut I got the last one and really liked it. Also kind of relate to it.
There you go Brandy ;
DeleteDareecha : window
Khwabgah : bedroom/sleeping chambers
Abr/ubr : cloud
Khiza: Autumn
Haal-e-dil : condition of heart
Wow! Thanks Namrota...
DeleteEverything makes much more sense now and I can safely tell you that they all are very beautiful lines.
The first one is highly commendable, I'd say.
Thanks Brandy...and you know the first one is my fav ;)
Deletesweet thoughts :) Love urdu poetry. Isi baat pe arz kiya hai yu to shama jala rakhi thi humne unke intezar me, aur wo begairat nikle ki aake shama bhuja gaye! Just tried my hands on it :P
ReplyDeletehahaha .. Saurabh looks like the person you talked about is working in a power-saving product making company :D
DeleteWell. nice attempt though !! :)
Wah Saurabh.. kya baat kya baat! That's really nice.. though one suggestion.. on the second line.
Deleteeither.. "woh itne baigharat nikle ki..."OR "aur woh baighairat, aake..";)
And Jack ...lolol... after reading your comment .. I read Saurabh's sher again.. damn you guy..hassi jaa rhai hun :))
Beautiful lines mam :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Jaseema :)
Deletenow thats another fatafati post bondhu !! God how come you know urdu so well .. I had to google few words :D
ReplyDeletebaba , ami bhebe chilam Robi Thankur .. eki .. tumi to Ghaalib !! :D
Thank you Thank you Jack... Ghaalib toh definitely not... ekhono sheekchhi...and as per my Urdu... I am still learning; courtesy: old hindi film songs and dialogues and my Muslim friends, one of them is a poet himself. So, there you go, my secret is out :o :P :D
DeleteUrdu means many words from the epiglottis !!
DeleteSaamble bondhu :) :D
Yea.. and the beauty lies in those words.. Aami shamble thaakbo ;)
Deletelines so beautiful :)
ReplyDeleteBeautiful lines..
ReplyDeleteThank you Chinmay :)
Deletei really liked the last one..its very romantic and effectively conveys how the entry of one speacial person makes the life so beautiful and full of life.
ReplyDeletegreat effort Namrota. I personally love urdu language a lot. Urdu words are very beautiful with high poetic richness. and while I say this...i am reminded of the song "Yaar mera khusboo ki tarah, jiski zuban Urdu ki tarah” from the song “Chhaiya Chhaiya”. Its a beautiful language to express love and romance.
All the best Namrota with your efforts. Looking forward to more shayaris from you in future.
I am so glad you liked it, Jigyasa.., I love Urdu Language as well...and I couldn't have expressed it better than how you did.."Urdu words are very beautiful with high poetic richness."
DeleteI am still learning .. both the Lingo and to weave them in poetry. so, thank you very much for the encouragement, I will share more shayaries, as and when I compose them. :)
Being from Lucknow..i just know few beautiful Urdu words..that comes naturally to people who belong there. but yes m glad you are wanting to learn urdu words...believe me..once you begin using even some of those beautiful words in your daily dialect..people simply go awestruck..thats the power and magic of Urdu.
DeleteI so agree with you Jigyasa... thats the reason why I am drawn to the language.
Deleteye dil maange more !!!!!!
ReplyDeleteDone-dona-done-done Indu *thumbs up* :)
DeleteOoh my god...it was so good...and the ending lines were priceless.....u know i had initially thought that u are a bengali girl, but now i wonder :O
ReplyDeleteThank you Ritesh :)
Deleteand lol... am a Mysterious girl :P
Lovely!!! Especially the last one :) Want to hear more... :)
ReplyDeleteWriting on the go
Thank you Hetal.. will surely write more :)
DeleteLoved the poem:-)
ReplyDeleteThank you Nagini :)
DeleteWow! Awesome! It's sad u didn't participate in the initiative on my blog :(
ReplyDeleteI did Bushra, I emailed you one the above couplets and even msged you twice on Google+ but I never heard from you. Looks like you missed them.
DeleteBeautiful.
ReplyDeleteThank you very much Rajesh :)
DeleteThats really lovely! u write well..:)
ReplyDeleteThank you AS :)
DeleteGood rhythm of emotions there.
ReplyDeleteHey Thanks Indrani :)
DeleteAbsolutely wonderful, Namrota!
ReplyDeleteThank you Amit :)
DeleteBahut Khoob
ReplyDeleteShukriya Ali :D
DeleteI am not a romantic and I suck at writing romance too but, I fell in love with this lines:
ReplyDelete"Samah sufiyana hogaya unke aane se
Warna toh hum khiza mein jiya karte the."
I just texted that to my hubby. It is my life story in two lines :D :D
You have a very nice grip of Urdu words, not overdoing it and keeping its purity and feelings balanced too.
Aww... I would like to know what your hubby had to say. :D
DeleteI am happy my words became part your love life ;)
And Thank you Dear :)
Beautiful Lines :)
ReplyDeleteDeeper Meaning lies in the lines.
Owwiee.. thank you Sagar :)
Delete